Slow down, there’s nowhere to be

Eugene and I saved towards our homestead for many years - we worked for nine years before we found our plot, built, and moved in. In that sense, we worked slowly and steadily.

Yet the days went so fast, filled with so many plans and so much hard work. I would set goals and tasks, and once one set of tasks were finished, I’d immediately start on the next set. The byproduct of working so hard has been believing that everyone else should do similarly.

My thoughts would follow a familiar path: "once X happens, then we'll be settled." "Once the baby is born," "once I defend my PhD," "once we find our plot," "once we build," "once we move in."

I was excellent at delayed gratification, which had some real benefits - it allowed us to save carefully, to buy our farm without debt. But it also meant I was always waiting for the next milestone, constantly deferring happiness. I don't remember much from those early years of farming because we were too busy with an endless to-do list.

The danger is that we're always rushing to get somewhere, so that then we can settle down and enjoy ourselves.

This tendency existed well before we started to farm. Moving to the homestead forced me to confront this tendency head-on. We had the homestead! And yet I still caught myself saying "one last push now, and then we can rest."

Slowly, our plans and goals have evolved towards a more realistic timeline, and we don’t have to be in a heightened state, racing to get them finished. I see our path of work and homesteading as being one path, but definitely not a universal one.

Here's what homesteading taught me: the projects are endless and infinite, even on a small scale like ours. They will always take longer than planned. If we couldn't enjoy our lives while the projects were happening, there was no future happiness to look forward to.

Whether you have somewhere to grow yet or not, find ways to celebrate small wins. Set up daily structures or rituals to remind yourself of your values, your direction, your progress, the gifts you've received, and the people you love.

Don’t create a permaculture plan for a space and then push to implement it rapidly. There is no such final plan, it is always an evolution based on the needs of people, animals, community.

We had to restructure our days to contain both genuine rest and meaningful work. The work would never end, nor would the improvements. But homesteading - living the perceived dream - doesn't automatically bring happiness.

Happiness is available here and now. Slow, steady progress will actually allow you to appreciate your values, your direction, and the journey itself.

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